The Attack Of The Killer Cliches

Calm down..clichés can’t kill you.  If they could, then everyone down here in the Deep South would be six feet under.  But, evidently, clichés are frowned upon in the publishing establishment.  At least that is what my some of the critiques have told me. So, what’s this southerner to do?

My novel takes place in the here and now, in the south, and my characters use clichés.  Why?  Because that’s how we talk down here…at least the people I’ve encountered.  Since my main character is using my voice (or I’m using hers…I can never get that straight) I naturally write dialogue with the dialect and clichés we use here.

So, I’m stuck…I can’t move forward and I can’t go back until I resolve this dilemma. What to do…what to do!

Do I change the setting of my novel to a place where clichés never pass anyone’s lips? Do I give up my attempts to be natural and honest in my dialogue?  Or, do I knuckle under and try to find another way to portray my characters?  Shoot, I feel like I’m damned if I do, and I’m damned if I don’t.

Now, not all the characters are southerners and they won’t be using phrases such as “stick it where the sun don’t shine.”  Future chapters will bring us characters from New Orleans, New York and as yet unknown locations (although I ‘ve heard rumors that some bloke from Australia might join the group..but he comes with his own set of clichés.)

But, my main character loves down south cliches…it’s her heritage, it’s her voice.  It’s who she is.  It’s me.

So, come on everyone, help a writer out.  I feel like I’m running through hell in a pair of gasoline shorts.  Give me your experience and your advice.

If you are one of the people who critiqued my first chapters and noted the use of clichés…know that I heard you and I love you for being honest.  If clichés are a stumbling block in the path of this novel, I needed to know.  I just need a little help in deciding if I go whole hog and keep my cliches or run for the hills and find another voice.

Help an old lady out..will ya?

Author’s note:  If it helps anyone to know this, the novel I’m writing is supposed to be funny!  I don’t know if that makes a difference or not!

Cranky’s Back In Town

Oh yeah.  Strike up the band and break open that champagne!  Cranky is home and look..look..she’s got a novel under her arm!

I can’t believe it!  I not only completed my Camp NaNoWriMo goal, I actually finished 6 days early.  And, thank goodness for that!  I have missed all of you so much.  Come here, give me a hug!

Huh, what was Camp like?  Wow, I can honestly say that I have never had to work so hard and enjoy it so much.  There were times, I admit, when I asked myself if I really wanted to try and write a novel in thirty days.  As my followers know, I had my doubts.

But, I forced myself to sit at my laptop each morning and place my fingers on the keyboard.  Somehow, after the first few paragraphs, my fingers started to pick up speed.  Before I knew it, I had completed a couple of chapters and had plans for the next few.  The effort paid off and this morning I was able to type those all important, so satisfying, absolutely delicious words, THE END!

Somehow, I have managed to write a story from beginning to end.  I have never accomplished that before (and this was my first shot at fiction.)  So, yeah, I’m bad!

Say that again?  What’s next?  Oh, that’s easy.  I’m going to take this novel and let it sit awhile, because right now, it’s a hot mess.  Although the plot is there, and the characters are in place, there is so much left to do before I even think of submitting it or allowing anyone to read it at this point.

Back stories have to be expanded or even developed.  Dialogue has to be polished and details need to be included so the story-line makes sense.  It’s a just a first draft; I had no dreams of writing a  novel that I could submit to anyone when I headed for camp.

But, I am delighted with the work I’ve completed.  It’s got real potential for a full blown novel!  And, I have made a commitment to myself to forge on with more drafts and build it into a sellable work.

So, I left camp this morning with a great feeling of accomplishment and am so thankful I had the opportunity to join other writers in a such a challenging feat!  And, I packed a whole lot of “You CAN do it” attitude in my backpack for my trip home.

Would I do it again?  Oh yeah..but not for awhile.  I want to catch up with all of you…not being able to write my posts excruciating!  I’m looking forward to reading your posts and interacting with all of you.

And, while we’re on the subject, let me thank all of you for your encouragement; your great comments and for actually checking in on me from time to time.  It kept me going and kept me motivated to make you all proud!

Would I recommend Camp NaNoWriMo?  You betcha.  It’s a great way to learn that to be a writer, you have to write..everyday!  Even if it’s just a paragraph or two, each time you sit down and put words together, you are improving your writing skills.

The camp offered motivational posts periodically and they had great forums you could jump into at any time.  Just be prepared to dedicate the time required to complete the goals you set.  It’s not always easy, but I’m here to tell you, it’s damn rewarding!

Plus, you get goodies if you reach your goal!  What are they?  I have no idea…can’t get them until May 1.  But, I’ve already gotten the ultimate trophy..my first novel tucked under my arm.

Life is Good!

Love,

Cranky

Who Makes The Beds?

The phone rings in the middle of the night.  The female detective reaches over, answers the phone and finds that there has been another murder.  She jumps out of bed, runs in the shower and prepares to fight for justice once again.  We follow her day; all kinds of suspects, all kinds of investigation techniques being implemented and possibly a few interrogations are thrown in.

After a exhausting day, she fixes dinner, has a glass of wine and prepares for bed. Donning jammies; she pulls back the covers and…WAIT A MINUTE!  Who made the bed?

I was making the third bed this morning: the master’s bed, the bed in the snoring room (my sinuses were especially active last night so I skedaddled from the master’s bedroom before I woke up the Bear!) and our son has visited for a week, so hence the third bed.  Suddenly it occurred to me, I rarely read about a hero or heroine taking this task in hand before they leave to conquer love, solve a mystery, or put a heinous villain behind bars.

Is this a chore deemed beneath the everyday heroes we read about?  I’ve noticed that some of them are filthy rich so I have no question that a maid, butler or cleaning woman tidies the bedroom each day in preparation for their employers return.

But every-day characters who live in modest surroundings and drive five-year old cars are basically on their own as far as bed maintenance is concerned.  There might have been a lover with the hero/heroine the night before; but I still haven’t read about them changing sheets and plumping the pillows before their departure!

So, do these characters think like my kids, who used to lament “But, Mom, I’m just going to back in it tonight!  Why make it now?”  Does the writer fail to describe how our heroes climb into wrinkled sheets, rumpled covers and lumpy pillows?

I have been accused of being a little compulsive when it comes to making the beds.  I don’t feel that the house looks clean unless all the beds in the house have been attended to.  Danny complains when he gets up in the early morning to use the bathroom and the bed is made upon his return.

He feels lucky I didn’t make it with him in it (I’ve tried, but it seems to wake him when I pull the pillow out from under his head.)  I have stayed in lovely hotels and made the bed before I left the room.

Now, in fiction, an unmade bed could be letting our readers know that our heroes are so dedicated that they care little about their own comfort.  But, the writer could at least let me know the bed is a mess when the hero climbs in. I know from experience that these sleeping units haven’t made themselves since the days of Samantha on “Bewitched!”

If there’s an overbearing mother; a lover looking to score points by leaving a beautifully made bed or a spouse doing their best to ensure the returning hero gets a good night’s sleep in a cozy, clean bed; let us know!

Sometimes, as my granny used to say, the devil is in the details!  As I’m learning more and more about writing a novel, I’m finding that leaving holes in our story weakens it.  We need to let our readers know how, when and where certain events come about; or why our characters feel, behave or react to other characters.  Otherwise, we leave them guessing.

Of course, my example is extreme..I doubt many readers besides myself wonders about the bed making skills of our heroes.  My point is that readers are smart and you must make sure you take the time to fill in the holes, don’t make the mistake of assuming they know your characters as well as you do.

So, when you’re writing your story, make sure you let your readers know your characters well, pay attention to the details and don’t leave them guessing “Who Made The Damn Bed?”

Just Saying!

Living In A Different Head

I think I’m in trouble.  I’m not quite myself lately, my thoughts are traveling in different directions and it feels like I’m living in a different head.

As some of you know, I’m writing a novel for Camp NaNoWriMo, and it is my first attempt to complete such an ambitious task.  But, that’s not my problem, that’s not what has my head spinning.

As with any novel, I have developed some characters and it’s the main character that is taking over my life.  It’s a woman and at first, all I knew of her was her name.  But, with each chapter, I am learning more and more about her.  Her strengths, her weaknesses, her quirky outlook on life are all becoming clearer to me.  She’s taking a journey and I’m on the ride right there with her.

In order to learn about her, I have to live in her head.  I have to do that so I can discover more about her and how she would react to certain events.  What would she think about a certain character; how would she handle a certain situation?  From things I’ve been told, it’s a normal process when you develop your characters to put something of yourself into them.  My character is a piece of myself and more..much more.  She’s small but she’s learning to live big…and as she learns about herself, I am learning from her.

Living in a different head has its price.  My man is looking at me wondering if I need professional help.  He watches as my eyes become glazed or I start chuckling for no reason, when I come to a dead stop while washing dishes or sweeping the floor and become lost in another world.

I’ve lost sleep; she travels often at night and drags me with her on her adventures. The words “Did you hear what I said?” are repeated throughout the day and a far-a-way look has become a constant sight for my poor guy.  But, he doesn’t know that I’m away for the moment, experiencing a new event, a new challenge, a new surprise, a new discovery about my character.

So, until the novel is finished and our journey has ended, I will continue to live in a different head.  But, that’s all right with me!  It’s a hell of a ride!

A New Page In My Life

What a wild coupla of months here in Blogsville!  I woke up this morning and realized that I had reached two months since I landed in WordPress, full of hope, ambition and a voice that was crying to be heard.  And, you my friends, have listened.  You’ve offered me encouragement; you’ve read my posts, you commented, and you heaped blessings on me.  What can I say?  You complete me! (shoot, I think someone else used that line!)

Anyway, I decided to let you in on a few things that are happening with me and my blog (yeah, I know, you’re on the edge of your seats!) The first change I’ve made is above the top of this post.  Look up…up..a little more!  See the “Awards” label?  Clicking on that will bring you to my new page in my blog site.  Guess what’s in it?

The overwhelming love you have sent in the form of awards inspired me to place all those badges on a separate page.  So, when you pop in for a visit, you’ll be able to check it out.  Now, it’s really not all about ME..Me..me! All my nominators are listed under the award they sent me; please take the time and visit their sites.  Each and every one of them is a super blogger and well worth a visit!

So the ostentatious display of badges I used to have on my posts can only be seen (if you really, really want to) on the “Awards” page.  You now have the choice of just reading my current post, reading my sad little profile or checking out the goods in the Awards room.  Easy, peasy!

Onward and upward.  I have only 2 days and a little over 16 hours before I arrive at Camp NaNoWriMo.  If I haven’t mentioned it, I’m going to their April Writing Camp and write a Novel in one month.  (Quit laughing..ok..are you done yet?)  My knees are shaking, my head is spinning and my eyes are rolling around and around.  What was I thinking when I enrolled in this camp?  Are my meds off again?

But, a challenge is why I signed up and Cranky never backs off a challenge.  So, I’m packing up my words and heading off for the campfires.  I’ve already got some cabin mates; (all female, so there goes my hopes of a Summer Camp Romance!)  I have done a small outline and written about 2000 words, which means I’m going to be flying by the seat of my pants for about 90% of the time I’m at camp!  And, I’m o.k. with that; I just hope that I don’t end up the creek with out the proverbial paddle!

What?  Did someone ask me what kind of novel I’m going to write?  I thought I’d go for a genre that would be a good fit for me;  I went with Comedy (big surprise, right?)  And, even though I’ve only written a few chapters; I’m already having a hell of a good time!  So, let’s see if I can keep my sense of humor trying to meet that 30 day deadline.

Now, they allow downtime during this camp (plus I’m gonna skip the Arts and Crafts classes so if you were expecting a handmade wallet, you’re out of luck), so I’ll still be posting here and putting my two cents in on your posts.  I’ll also try and keep you updated on what’s happening in Camp..hopefully I’ll get some good gossip advice I can pass on to you!  You might get a postcard from me begging you to let me come home..ignore them!

Before I close, I’d also like to share with you a first in my experience as a blogger.  I got my first Cyber-bully and boy, was he/she a doozy!  Now, I’ve got a tough hide but this commenter really pissed me off got to me.  They were looking for a debate (or a cat-fight..meow) and got really insulting when I wouldn’t join in.  However, I just gave them a final “Talk to the hand”  and changed my comments so that all have to be approved before appearing on my post.  It’s a little more work but at least you won’t be subjected to this bully’s comments in my blog.  Life goes on!

So, to make a long story short (much too late) I’m turning a new page in my life…let’s hope I get to write lots of neat things on it!

Just saying!